What i realized from teaching layton

After having Layton, i've begin to experience what it's like to be a parent, but today i realized something else. From the articles i've read about training puppies, one very important aspect is to take away his food and toys when he's playing with it. Why? Because this teaches him that it's ok for things to taken away. On Dog Whisperer we always see dogs that are aggressive and show anger when someone comes close to his toys or food. We know those dogs have serious problems, and are the ones that need rehabilitation. Today Layton was playing with his chew toy, i took it away and gave it back, and then took it away and gave it back. He was a good boy of course, and i wanted him to know that i will give it back, sometimes give him something even better. But i thought, what if i didn't give it back? He should still be obedient and calm, because we (emily and I) are the ones that bought him the stuff in the first place right?

What about us and our stuff? Who gives us our home, money, security, parents, relationships? What if God decides to take something away? Usually he will give us something better in return (like i do to layton, because i love him so much, i just want him to learn not to appreciate the things, but appreciate the person that gives him the things, ME!), but even if he doesn't who are we to become angry, bitter, or aggressive? He is the one who gives all things! "You give and take away, you give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Lord blessed be your name!"

Working Mom

Hey guys,

haha, it's been a while! I was listening to mom complaining about her coworkers last night when I suddenly realized what a blessing it was for her to even have a job to complain about. Not sure if I've told everybody in joshua yet, but my mother's lack of employment has been one of my long term prayer requests for a while and a few months ago God opened a door for her. haha, she would complain about her bosses, her coworkers, her salary, her clients, just about everything imaginable...but overall I can tell she is much happier now - even if she needs the occasional reminder of that fact. The job has been a great blessing in her life in not only the financial sense, but also in teaching her a lot about dealing with people outside family and church setting. It gives her a new social circle and people to evangelize to. So yes, props to God and mad thanks for my mother's complaints and for all the little blessings in life that doesn't always look like blessings until u look at it correctly.

Edward

prayer with faith

last Sunday when Sherri and I were praying, she asked that I pray for her class registration. so we did it very routinely. we said something like please let it be smooth and let her get all the classes she wanted, and that was it. that prayer had no energy nor faith. i didn't even feel peace after that prayer. when the morning came (i called her to wake her up, then i was planning to go back to sleep), I remembered that last time it took her 3 hours to get into the system. so i sort of prayed again that the system would run smoothly. suddenly, i felt it was useless if i didn't pray with faith. so i decided that i would pray until I'm confident that the system will let her in quickly. to my surprise, it only took me 30 sec to get to the state where i felt peace and comforting. it felt like a decision i had to make; i decided that i will trust in the lord and believe that he will make this happen. that afternoon Sherri told me she logged in within 5 minutes! Praise the Lord! it really makes a difference when we pray with faith and know that he is God!

First Born's Blessing

uber profound sermon i heard over lunch.

Tim Keller drew connection between the Jacob/Esau blessings story in Genesis 27 and our relationship w/ Jesus. With jacob and esau there was a role reversal where the younger brother got the blessings the older brother was supposed to get. Jesus is the older brother (colossians 1:15) and WE got the blessing that was due to him. The difference here is that w/ jacob, the younger brother had to dress up as the older brother in order to take his blessing; with Christ, it is the OLDER brother who made himself like the younger (us) in order to take our curse upon himself so that we can be blessed.

this was so deep i sat in stupor for about 5 whole minutes thinking about it.

in case u guys wanna hear it: http://sermons2.redeemer.com/sermons/problem-blessing

Practice Test

Hey guys,

i took a MCAT practice test last saturday. Did horribly on the science portions which was expected since i haven't studied everything yet and in true Murphian manner, all the stuff i haven't studied turned up on the test. I'm really not TOO worried about that, as i finish studying and practicing science problems my scores usually improves. What reeeeeally surprised me was how well I did on the reading comprehension part. Despite being an avid reader, i tend to read slowly, which has resulted in barely average reading comprehension scores ever since highschool SAT days. Even the last time I tested my reading comprehension less than a month ago i scored 10 out of 15 (average score). Last saturday, without any additional training or practice, I somehow scored 14 (or maybe 15). People simply DON'T improve 4 or 5 points on their MCAT scores practically overnight without any additional practice. Very obvious to me that it wasn't anything I did, but only by God's grace. God's awesome, and im now really motivated to study hard and improve my science scores as well. Starting to look like MCATs might actually end up glorifying Him instead of being an embarrassment.. -.-v

All Glory and Good Stuff to Him,

Edward

a little cool thing that happened

I just remember this and wanted to share it. Yesterday as Zack and I were driving Janice's van, he rolled down the window on the passenger side. However, the window would not go back up. It turns out something was wrong with the controls of the window, so there was no way we could get the window to roll up. Me being the smart engineer suggested we try to lower the window all the way, then try pressing the up button. We were now stuck with the passenger window rolled all the way down, without an answer to roll it back up. Then zack started praying for the window controls. We tried it again, and it didn't work. By this time we were already on the freeway, and it was hella loud. I tried to call janice but she didn't pick up. I was worrying about what we were to do when we parked (we were on our way to play bball), and then all of a sudden it just worked, and we closed the window. Haha, God works in little things too! I have no idea how it got fixed, besides the fact that zack prayed. So amen for that.

Impossibilities

I dont think we ever notice the impossible demands that God places on us. We're called to lose our lives, to be born again, to focus our everything upon Him - quite honestly, we have about as much chance of accomplishing all of this as the proverbial camel has of passing through the eye of a needle. That is the whole point though, the reply jesus gave to the disciples' fair question "who can be saved?" was "with man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." We're so inherently God hating by nature that any effort made to pray, go to church, or do any good deed - much less to love in the way that God expects of us - MUST be done through His spirit. To me, this also means that any good thing that comes out of me is yet another evidence of His grace.

"Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots? Neither can you do good who are accustomed to doing evil." - Jeremiah 13:23

Obligation

Hello All! It's been awhile, so once again, bear with me as I try to get all my thoughts together. I was chatting briefly with Edward this past Wednesday night (or maybe it was Tuesday...) and it was pretty late. I asked him why he was still up, and he said he was writing his Wednesday email. So I thought..."if this were me, I'd probably be in bed and skip writing the email for one week." But Edward of course being super awesome, stayed up late (late for my standards) and finished the email and sent it out.

This made me think, a lot of times in my life I put things that help me grow closer to God as optional, and if I do something, I sometimes feel like I'm forced or obligated. I figure God forgives, He knows my heart, He knows I love him. But am I really growing or am I deceiving myself? If it were 12:00 at night and I had a report due for work, I would have no hesitation in staying up late to write the report. But if I were just planning an event or writing a blog entry, I would probably put it off. So what makes my work #1 and my walk with God #2, 3, or 4?

So today I would like to make a change. Even if I'm tired, serving our Father is really such a blessing. I don't think there is one time that I've regretted staying up late planning, fellowshipping, or praying, because God has always showed me that He is soooo much more than I can ever imagine Him to be! I know that there are times in my life where I will be obligated or forced to do something, but I hope to change my attitude. I would like to try and seize each opportunity to grow my relationship and to glorify Him!! I know this is corny, but life really is short, and God has blessed me with soooo much. I don't want to have an attitude of me, me me. I'd like it to be God, God, God, Isaac, me, family, friends, Bigby, God, God, food, home, work, play, etc. =D

Have a great week everyone!

Worship

Hahah, been a while since we've used this - I keep forgetting to put stuff up here.

Anyways, realized last nite that I was really out of practice with the guitar - a part of it is jus stage fright, and a part of it is that i can't sing/play well at the same time, but a large part is probably also because i haven't really practiced since last year sometimes. So i picked up my guitar today and worshiped for like an hour (cause im sick of studying). It felt good to worship again, almost forgot wat its like to play and sing while no one's listening except God. I know we're supposed to worship God through everything we do, but i do seem to remember a passage specifically about praising God w/ musical instruments - today was a good reminder of that, how music should be a part of our worhsip life.

Fasting Part II

Hmm...I started realizing towards the end of the fast a few weeks ago that about the only thing I've accomplished was realize how unfocused on God i was - almost felt like i was jus stupidly starving myself. It was great and encouraging to hear everyone share about how they were getting closer to God but i still dont feel satisfied with where i am so imma fast again this wed-fri. This time, really taking out all distractions and get serious about reconnecting with Him. I hate being so distracted from God to the point where even praying and bible reading is becoming a chore.. =(

So ya, this is more to let u guys know where i am than an invitation to starve urselves a second time with me - but feel free to join in if u still feel unfocused!

Fasting day 2 - Weakness

Sorry, wrote this yesterday.... forgot to post...

Second day of the fast. It seems like i am a lot hungrier than yesterday during lunch. As i was reading a paper, i really couldn't concentrate on it anymore because of the hunger, so i knew God was pulling me away. I took a short walk around campus today to spend time with him. My body was felt very weak while i was walking, and i felt really hungry.  But walking away from my desk definitely helped me concentrate on my time with God. Today i realized how weak i was. I've only skipped one meal and i already feel like my body is deteriorating, without God's provision of food, how can i even function?? This gave me a clear perspective of where God was and where i am.

This spurred me to realize how prideful i was in my life. Recently my life just seem full of stuff to do, problems to solve (both in research and in my new home), and each time i feel like i can take on the challenge and solve it by myself. I never stopped to ask God for help, even when things aren't going exactly right. I pride myself in the ability to solve challenges, but it has caused my life to be self centered and too prideful to ask God for anything. Even though i ask for prayer on Friday for my research work, but when i do encounter problems i just mindlessly go on google or read papers, instead of slowing down to pray. So i did. I prayed for my research and all the problems i'm encountering, and i asked for help. And then i waited, and continued walking to spend time with God. At the end of the walk, all of a sudden i thought of something for my research, not exactly a break through, but a change of perspective! Can i just say God works very quickly!?

anyway, one more day for the fast!
isaac

Fasting: Day 2

Sup guys,

It has been wonderfully encouraging reading each of your respective stories, keep it up everyone! haha - to be honest, the fasting experience has been a slow start for me this time around and it wasn't until last night that I started hearing something that was tangibly God. I was reading how jesus was throwing money changers out of the temple. I've always assumed that this was because they were doing business in the house of God, and seeing as how i'm not selling cds of my awesome guitar playing in church - this passage doesn't seem to apply to me.

I learnt that he wasn't kicking them out because they were conducting business or even cheating their customers. He was pissed because this was all their worship had degenerated into - a sinful life punctuated with the occasional sacrifice that was the moral equivalent of a half-hearted scrub at the stains that sin leaves behind. He was angered at this religious institution that the temple had come to represent and how God was not a part of it. THIS is something that applies to me, i have so many religious habits that i wrap around myself thinking that these are what would draw me closer to God when in reality they've become hindrances - just as the temple/laws became to the jewish people. In the same way that jesus said he would destroy the temple and rebuild it in three days, I find that I need to take apart everything that I think of as my "spiritual life" and rebuild whenever I feel like im not getting closer to God. The nature of our faith is to grow, if im NOT getting closer to God then i am either backsliding, or stagnating.

He loves us

This past weekend, I made a trip down to sunny San Diego, and didn't expect much other than meeting up with old friends and reliving my SoCal days. It turned out to be one encouraging weekend. For the past couple of months, I've felt distant from God and had doubts about how God could use me or work with me. Through a sermon on predestination vs. freewill, of all topics, I received new-found strength and a strong sense of God's love for me and everyone around me. On one of the pastor's points, he referenced Philippians 1:6, "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." The pastor went on to say that there WILL be times when we feel distant from God, doubt God, or drift away. But we can be confident in knowing that He will finish what He started. God loves all of us so much. The service ended with the song "He loves us". The chorus, "He loves us, Oh how he loves us...." really really hit me, and the words I was singing became so real. Although I've felt discouraged, confused, or lost, God says.. hey I'm still here. Conclusion: God REALLY loves us and during times when we feel distant, know that He is still working and He will finish the good work He's started in us.

Fasting day 1

Hey all! I am not very eloquent with words...so bear with me while I splurge out some of my thoughts from my first day of fasting.
Today at work I talked to one of my co-workers about fasting, and amazingly enough, I felt really comfortable talking about my faith and why I was doing what I was doing. Usually I feel really awkward and unwilling to share about my faith, but today was different because of the 7 other people in the office, one other person was a Christian as well. The support I felt knowing that I wasn't alone made it easier for me to share.
At first when I was praying in the car, I felt really proud that I took this step. Later however, it also made me think about the fact that I should be able to share my faith even without another christian there. So I think for the next 2 days, I'm going to really pray about owning my faith and not letting it be dependent on others. Hope this all makes sense...it did in my head =D Hope you all are doing well!!!

Fasting - day 1

Since some of us are fasting from today till Friday, i think it would be good to share a little about the experience, hopefully to encourage each other! Emily and i decided to we're going to fast lunch, not every meal.

During this time with God instead of lunch, the first thing that came in my mind(besides I'M HUNGRY) is to try and find things in my life to pray for. So i waited, and waited, and nothing came into mind. At first i thought, "Wow, thank you jesus! My life is so good, i really can't think of anything else i need." So i start praying for other people (on top of praying for a better relationship with God, but who doesn't pray for that? =P). However, i soon realized that this is a problem. My prayer life has slowly become me asking Jesus to do things. No matter if it's for myself or other people, i've fallen into a trap of being a spoiled brat. "I want this, i want that, blah blah blah!" And as i get into this habit, i realize that my "smooth sailing" life is exactly why i'm drifting from God. Since i don't have needs, then i will spend less and less time with God!! People always say that it's easier to praise God when everything is going right, and hard when nothing is going right. I think that's true, but at the same time, it's harder to grow when everything is going right!! I am not asking God for a difficult challenge (or hardship) to appear in my life so i grow, but i will be asking God for the ability to grow closer when everything is "smooth sailing"!

How's everyone else doing?

Enough

While i was cleaning up the remaining bits of my old apartment, i kept wondering, how clean does it need to be? Am i doing enough? As i thought about it more, i realized that i face this question everyday. I'm always wondering if i'm doing _enough_ for my Ph.D program to eventually graduate. Emily is always worried that she's not doing _enough_ for her job (even though all the teachers say she's doing "beyond expectations"). Which leads me to the questions, how do we know when it's "Enough"?

Often we don't know what the standard is, thus, one thing we do is to try and measure against other people. We falsely compare ourselves to other people which either creates a sense of guilt (i'm not doing enough), or complacency (he's doing way less than i am). My spiritual journey is like this all the time. It's hard to judge whether i'm doing "enough" for God (since most of the time i think i'm not). Thus i start comparing to other people to find excuses (I'm doing more than him/her), or i fee guilty that i'm not doing enough, so i try to do more but for the wrong reasons...

I believe this constant battle of trying to do "enough" is us trying to "earn" approval. This is the exact opposite of what God wants. He simply wants us to be loved by him first. This goes for everything else in life as well. There's no point in me trying to compare myself to other Ph.D students. The standard is set by God, and i'm doing it all for him. Not to "earn" his approval, but to glorify him! I hope that we can all approach our lives in this way, so we're not motivated by guilt, nor are we slowed by complacency. We're simply doing everything for Him!

*P.S. Because of moving, this entry spanned a whole 5 days since last Friday..

Fasting

When uncle joe challenged us to write a personal mission statement for our lives i wrote something to the effect of having a Heavenly trajectory for my life and honestly haven't been keeping to that statement. Lately i feel like my mind's been drifting Ed-ward instead of God-ward (haha get it, get it?). Been thinking about doing a 3 day fast next week to get refocused back on God - anyone else interested in doing this with me?

Step 1: Don't eat.
Step 2: Pray when you should be eating.

Doesn't have to be all 3 meals of the day or even about food, the whole point of fasting is to shed stuff that pulls us from God.

Eating Habits

It is kind of encouraging to see people post here...haha I hope it's not just a burst of interest. Anyways, I want to share something about eating habits. We all know that we're suppose to chew our food thoroughly and swallow them slowly. well...at least the Chinese culture teach that. It promotes digestion in our mouth and discourage choking, which in turn improves our health status. but I noticed that we should eat the spirit food the same way we eat our regular food. today at the small group leaders' meeting, Don was reading a verse for us. and he read it soooo slowly....word by word. at first i thought "what the heck.... so slow dude..." but then i realized how inadequate and hasty my bible reading is. i try to go through it fast thinking that i'll retain the info, but i probably forget about it after i've pronounced it out of my mouth. Don's reading really reminded me that i should chew God's words slowly and really absorb the nutrients that are in it. and think of God's word as i crave for Taiwan foods. it's a mentality change for me today!

Transformation!

I should have posted this yesterday, but since i was moving and packing i got lazy. But one theme that keeps reoccuring in my life is how God transforms people. This thought first hit me during last week's sermon verses (2 Kings 5:1~14). The basic story is Naaman is this army leader who has leprosy. He wants to get healed so he goes to meet Elisha. Elisha then sends his servant who tells Naaman to wash in the river 7 times. Naaman is pissed as he was expecting Elisha to come out and wave his hands and pray over him, but he still does it and is healed.

We are like Naaman sometimes, when we want to be transformed we expect God to do it in a miraculous way (like how Naaman wanted a crazy hand waving and praying) or a sudden thunderous change. However, sometimes God works in small and ordinary ways (like how a Naaman just needed to wash his wounds like he always did, but with FAITH) but the results are even better and longer lasting than any miraculous change. In my life i have started trying to notice God in my ordinary daily life (hence the moving day post...). I believe God is calling for a transformation in OUR faith, but not through EXTRAordinary measures, but simply through seemingly ordinary ways. 

Ed's sharing was a complete confirmation of this for me, especially when he shared about his trip. "It wasn't a trip about burning bushes, but how his life collided with theirs." Ed's verse was money:

The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"
- 1 King 19:11-13

moving day

Hey everyone!! Just wanted to share with you guys how AWESOME God is =D Today we rented a U-Haul to move over most of our stuff to the new place, but we were very worried that our stuff would get wet since it was pouring rain. However, God is awesome and the rain let up right when we were loading the car and moving everything over. Plus, we were so blessed to have the support and muscles of our friends Zack, David, and Albert. The move was much faster and enjoyable with our friends around us and God's sunshine beaming down. Even through the small things, God shows that he loves us!

Posting with your own account

Hey guys everyone can post with their own account!! Check your email and accept invitation!
Here's some instructions to get started:
1) Accept invitation from your gmail, and choose a display name.
2) To post a new entry, sign in your account (top right corner should say "sign in"
3) Then, click on "Dashboard", you should see the blogs your managing, and a big button that says "New Post". Click on it to start a new post. (Or click on "New Post" on the bar above)
4)You can also follow the blog by clicking the google "follow" button on the left of the blog.
5) You can comment on each post by clicking "comment" below the post

First Post

Guys! Lets share how God is working in our lives and be encouraged!

-isaac