I dont think we ever notice the impossible demands that God places on us. We're called to lose our lives, to be born again, to focus our everything upon Him - quite honestly, we have about as much chance of accomplishing all of this as the proverbial camel has of passing through the eye of a needle. That is the whole point though, the reply jesus gave to the disciples' fair question "who can be saved?" was "with man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." We're so inherently God hating by nature that any effort made to pray, go to church, or do any good deed - much less to love in the way that God expects of us - MUST be done through His spirit. To me, this also means that any good thing that comes out of me is yet another evidence of His grace.
"Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots? Neither can you do good who are accustomed to doing evil." - Jeremiah 13:23
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Obligation
Hello All! It's been awhile, so once again, bear with me as I try to get all my thoughts together. I was chatting briefly with Edward this past Wednesday night (or maybe it was Tuesday...) and it was pretty late. I asked him why he was still up, and he said he was writing his Wednesday email. So I thought..."if this were me, I'd probably be in bed and skip writing the email for one week." But Edward of course being super awesome, stayed up late (late for my standards) and finished the email and sent it out.
This made me think, a lot of times in my life I put things that help me grow closer to God as optional, and if I do something, I sometimes feel like I'm forced or obligated. I figure God forgives, He knows my heart, He knows I love him. But am I really growing or am I deceiving myself? If it were 12:00 at night and I had a report due for work, I would have no hesitation in staying up late to write the report. But if I were just planning an event or writing a blog entry, I would probably put it off. So what makes my work #1 and my walk with God #2, 3, or 4?
So today I would like to make a change. Even if I'm tired, serving our Father is really such a blessing. I don't think there is one time that I've regretted staying up late planning, fellowshipping, or praying, because God has always showed me that He is soooo much more than I can ever imagine Him to be! I know that there are times in my life where I will be obligated or forced to do something, but I hope to change my attitude. I would like to try and seize each opportunity to grow my relationship and to glorify Him!! I know this is corny, but life really is short, and God has blessed me with soooo much. I don't want to have an attitude of me, me me. I'd like it to be God, God, God, Isaac, me, family, friends, Bigby, God, God, food, home, work, play, etc. =D
Have a great week everyone!
This made me think, a lot of times in my life I put things that help me grow closer to God as optional, and if I do something, I sometimes feel like I'm forced or obligated. I figure God forgives, He knows my heart, He knows I love him. But am I really growing or am I deceiving myself? If it were 12:00 at night and I had a report due for work, I would have no hesitation in staying up late to write the report. But if I were just planning an event or writing a blog entry, I would probably put it off. So what makes my work #1 and my walk with God #2, 3, or 4?
So today I would like to make a change. Even if I'm tired, serving our Father is really such a blessing. I don't think there is one time that I've regretted staying up late planning, fellowshipping, or praying, because God has always showed me that He is soooo much more than I can ever imagine Him to be! I know that there are times in my life where I will be obligated or forced to do something, but I hope to change my attitude. I would like to try and seize each opportunity to grow my relationship and to glorify Him!! I know this is corny, but life really is short, and God has blessed me with soooo much. I don't want to have an attitude of me, me me. I'd like it to be God, God, God, Isaac, me, family, friends, Bigby, God, God, food, home, work, play, etc. =D
Have a great week everyone!
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Worship
Hahah, been a while since we've used this - I keep forgetting to put stuff up here.
Anyways, realized last nite that I was really out of practice with the guitar - a part of it is jus stage fright, and a part of it is that i can't sing/play well at the same time, but a large part is probably also because i haven't really practiced since last year sometimes. So i picked up my guitar today and worshiped for like an hour (cause im sick of studying). It felt good to worship again, almost forgot wat its like to play and sing while no one's listening except God. I know we're supposed to worship God through everything we do, but i do seem to remember a passage specifically about praising God w/ musical instruments - today was a good reminder of that, how music should be a part of our worhsip life.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Fasting Part II
Hmm...I started realizing towards the end of the fast a few weeks ago that about the only thing I've accomplished was realize how unfocused on God i was - almost felt like i was jus stupidly starving myself. It was great and encouraging to hear everyone share about how they were getting closer to God but i still dont feel satisfied with where i am so imma fast again this wed-fri. This time, really taking out all distractions and get serious about reconnecting with Him. I hate being so distracted from God to the point where even praying and bible reading is becoming a chore.. =(
So ya, this is more to let u guys know where i am than an invitation to starve urselves a second time with me - but feel free to join in if u still feel unfocused!
So ya, this is more to let u guys know where i am than an invitation to starve urselves a second time with me - but feel free to join in if u still feel unfocused!
Friday, January 29, 2010
Fasting day 2 - Weakness
Sorry, wrote this yesterday.... forgot to post...
Second day of the fast. It seems like i am a lot hungrier than yesterday during lunch. As i was reading a paper, i really couldn't concentrate on it anymore because of the hunger, so i knew God was pulling me away. I took a short walk around campus today to spend time with him. My body was felt very weak while i was walking, and i felt really hungry. But walking away from my desk definitely helped me concentrate on my time with God. Today i realized how weak i was. I've only skipped one meal and i already feel like my body is deteriorating, without God's provision of food, how can i even function?? This gave me a clear perspective of where God was and where i am.
This spurred me to realize how prideful i was in my life. Recently my life just seem full of stuff to do, problems to solve (both in research and in my new home), and each time i feel like i can take on the challenge and solve it by myself. I never stopped to ask God for help, even when things aren't going exactly right. I pride myself in the ability to solve challenges, but it has caused my life to be self centered and too prideful to ask God for anything. Even though i ask for prayer on Friday for my research work, but when i do encounter problems i just mindlessly go on google or read papers, instead of slowing down to pray. So i did. I prayed for my research and all the problems i'm encountering, and i asked for help. And then i waited, and continued walking to spend time with God. At the end of the walk, all of a sudden i thought of something for my research, not exactly a break through, but a change of perspective! Can i just say God works very quickly!?
anyway, one more day for the fast!
isaac
Second day of the fast. It seems like i am a lot hungrier than yesterday during lunch. As i was reading a paper, i really couldn't concentrate on it anymore because of the hunger, so i knew God was pulling me away. I took a short walk around campus today to spend time with him. My body was felt very weak while i was walking, and i felt really hungry. But walking away from my desk definitely helped me concentrate on my time with God. Today i realized how weak i was. I've only skipped one meal and i already feel like my body is deteriorating, without God's provision of food, how can i even function?? This gave me a clear perspective of where God was and where i am.
This spurred me to realize how prideful i was in my life. Recently my life just seem full of stuff to do, problems to solve (both in research and in my new home), and each time i feel like i can take on the challenge and solve it by myself. I never stopped to ask God for help, even when things aren't going exactly right. I pride myself in the ability to solve challenges, but it has caused my life to be self centered and too prideful to ask God for anything. Even though i ask for prayer on Friday for my research work, but when i do encounter problems i just mindlessly go on google or read papers, instead of slowing down to pray. So i did. I prayed for my research and all the problems i'm encountering, and i asked for help. And then i waited, and continued walking to spend time with God. At the end of the walk, all of a sudden i thought of something for my research, not exactly a break through, but a change of perspective! Can i just say God works very quickly!?
anyway, one more day for the fast!
isaac
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Fasting: Day 2
Sup guys,
It has been wonderfully encouraging reading each of your respective stories, keep it up everyone! haha - to be honest, the fasting experience has been a slow start for me this time around and it wasn't until last night that I started hearing something that was tangibly God. I was reading how jesus was throwing money changers out of the temple. I've always assumed that this was because they were doing business in the house of God, and seeing as how i'm not selling cds of my awesome guitar playing in church - this passage doesn't seem to apply to me.
I learnt that he wasn't kicking them out because they were conducting business or even cheating their customers. He was pissed because this was all their worship had degenerated into - a sinful life punctuated with the occasional sacrifice that was the moral equivalent of a half-hearted scrub at the stains that sin leaves behind. He was angered at this religious institution that the temple had come to represent and how God was not a part of it. THIS is something that applies to me, i have so many religious habits that i wrap around myself thinking that these are what would draw me closer to God when in reality they've become hindrances - just as the temple/laws became to the jewish people. In the same way that jesus said he would destroy the temple and rebuild it in three days, I find that I need to take apart everything that I think of as my "spiritual life" and rebuild whenever I feel like im not getting closer to God. The nature of our faith is to grow, if im NOT getting closer to God then i am either backsliding, or stagnating.
It has been wonderfully encouraging reading each of your respective stories, keep it up everyone! haha - to be honest, the fasting experience has been a slow start for me this time around and it wasn't until last night that I started hearing something that was tangibly God. I was reading how jesus was throwing money changers out of the temple. I've always assumed that this was because they were doing business in the house of God, and seeing as how i'm not selling cds of my awesome guitar playing in church - this passage doesn't seem to apply to me.
I learnt that he wasn't kicking them out because they were conducting business or even cheating their customers. He was pissed because this was all their worship had degenerated into - a sinful life punctuated with the occasional sacrifice that was the moral equivalent of a half-hearted scrub at the stains that sin leaves behind. He was angered at this religious institution that the temple had come to represent and how God was not a part of it. THIS is something that applies to me, i have so many religious habits that i wrap around myself thinking that these are what would draw me closer to God when in reality they've become hindrances - just as the temple/laws became to the jewish people. In the same way that jesus said he would destroy the temple and rebuild it in three days, I find that I need to take apart everything that I think of as my "spiritual life" and rebuild whenever I feel like im not getting closer to God. The nature of our faith is to grow, if im NOT getting closer to God then i am either backsliding, or stagnating.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
He loves us
This past weekend, I made a trip down to sunny San Diego, and didn't expect much other than meeting up with old friends and reliving my SoCal days. It turned out to be one encouraging weekend. For the past couple of months, I've felt distant from God and had doubts about how God could use me or work with me. Through a sermon on predestination vs. freewill, of all topics, I received new-found strength and a strong sense of God's love for me and everyone around me. On one of the pastor's points, he referenced Philippians 1:6, "...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." The pastor went on to say that there WILL be times when we feel distant from God, doubt God, or drift away. But we can be confident in knowing that He will finish what He started. God loves all of us so much. The service ended with the song "He loves us". The chorus, "He loves us, Oh how he loves us...." really really hit me, and the words I was singing became so real. Although I've felt discouraged, confused, or lost, God says.. hey I'm still here. Conclusion: God REALLY loves us and during times when we feel distant, know that He is still working and He will finish the good work He's started in us.
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